PMS

I can’t believe how time flies. I looked at my blog today and it has been more than 2 weeks since I was here. So here is an update on Moose life.
2 weeks ago I had PMS- very bad PMS. I always have some PMS symptoms. Some are physical most are emotional. I am easily irritated when I have PMS. When I say easily I don’t mean that if you cut in line in front of me at the DMV I will freak out. No I mean if someone drank the last of the OJ and I wanted some- I will take your head off and drink your blood instead. I will not just drink something else or go to the store. I am like a fire breathing dragon. I like to have my way when I am normal, but during PMS my way is the only way there is “why would any of the rest of stupid people in the world ever consider doing things some other way”. When I am in this state my family tries to stay clear of me and I try to do all things that I like my way all by myself. But we were going camping so we were trying to pack together- this is a mistake when I am the PMS monster. I should pack everything to avoid the next part of the story.
I asked my daughter to do something simple- put the food that I laid out on the counter in the cooler and put the ice in too. Well Deer had filled the cooler with soda. I did not know this. He then tells Fawn to put the ice in the cooler. Of course the food then did not fit. So she comes to me and asks for help but doesn’t say anything about the soda. For some unknown PMS reason when I see the soda they set me off in to a fit of rage. I start ranting “How could he be so stupid… the food is more important…….. we can add soda later ….Now I have to take out all this ice… we have another cooler that I good for soda. But we need another bag of ice… I wish I had known he wanted to pack a case of soda…. I would have bought more ice…. ” This is all I can remember saying I was so angry I can’t remember what I was saying. Finally I figure out what to do. By this point I have run in out of the house to the garage a few times and I am slamming things in and out of the cooler and slamming the door open and closed each time I go in and out of the garage.
I’m sure it was a great show for my neighbors. Look there is the psycho neighbor- be careful she may start breathing fire or drinking blood any time now.
The last time I slammed open the door my husband was walking past on the other side. I slammed the door right into his right leg. Yes that is the hurt leg- the one that he broke and is the reason he is retired from the Army and cannot work because of the debilitating pain and swelling. Yes, Ok, I am an @$$^#%*. The worst thing about it was he was in pain and so couldn’t go camping with us. Nothing was broken or seriously injured. But I was in a PMS rage. So did I show concern?-Nope, I was an@$$^#%*.I said “well I didn’t know you were there. I can’t see through the door.” Fire breathing dragons are nicer than me. My husband I have an argument because I am a jerk and I am also in this adrenaline and female hormone induced stupid state. He finally realizes what I going on. Of course I had no clue I was an idiot. And he lets me run off the steam from my fit. When I finally come down from this rage I start sobbing and begging for forgiveness and I can’t stop crying.
It was like I was a teenager with no control over anything I was doing and being run by my hormones. I felt insane. It seems that my PMS has been getting worse. I seem to be losing control far more than I used to. I am so cranky and unreasonable that I can’t figure out how my family can stand to live with me. PMS stinks and I am a jerk.